Petite, Feminine and Perfect
Let me take this moment to thank the Internet. I whine about it a lot, I use it for a lot of random, bullshit things - but it's a great invention.
I just got an email with my friend Missy's ultrasound attached. And there's a real, live baby in there. You can see it. And to look like a wuss for just a moment - I cried, and cried, and cried. Because I miss them. Because I was there through all of the horrible things and heartbreaking moments that led up to this email, this picture of a tiny little life living inside one of the most wonderful people I've ever known, who happens to be married to another one of the most wonderful people I've ever known.
It's a girl.
And I'm afraid I won't be there when she's born. That she won't know me the way I hope she will. That I'll be too far away to mean anything.
I knew this email was coming - Missy called me and told me about it, about the appointment, and that she was sending it. But here it is, this first baby picture in another window just behind this one, and I'm awed. I'm not really one for gushy emotion, but anyone who knows me knows that I'm just loaded with gushy emotion, and sometimes I just gush all over the place. This is me, gushing.
This is me, really, honestly homesick for the first time since I left, up at five in the morning and crying all over my keyboard over an ultrasound. I suppose it's a number of things, actually - but let's blame it on the ultrasound.
We joked about what they were going to name her, the forerunner being Charlotte. I said Charlotte was an old lady's name, but Charlotte is French for 'petite and feminine' which is exactly what this baby happens to be. So my vote is Charlotte Maille - 'petite, feminine and perfect.'
'Cause she is.
It's pronounced "Mail-lee."
And I love you guys, too. Smooches.
I feel sacriligious writing here, but....I wanna see! I Wanna See! I WANNA SEE! Missy, e-mail baby picture to me please. Me! I promise I won't make any jokes about babyies' unnaturally big heads. Oops.
Posted by: Anne at February 7, 2002 09:40 AMMissy and Steven, I need to see the baby too!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is so awesome! And my vote goes for Shannon's suggestion, because she will be perfect - until she reaches about 16 - but that's another story for another day....
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so what do i say about that? i'm crying of course. steven too. i certainly didn't want to make you sad, but honestly i'm glad you are. i'm glad we're worth being missed. i don't know what to say about you're concerns, Except that it's just geography. And that my child will know you as model for friendships in her own life. i hope that as she grows, she finds a friend like you, one that remains above all things- true, big truth, like aristotle truth. your fears are well founded and are coupled by my own. Let's face it, i may never know this child, this future woman the way i hope i will either. i like your name suggestion, but how is that pronounced? i love you dearly, and since the baby still does what it's told, she loves you too. steven too. even the dog misses you.
Posted by: missy at February 6, 2002 07:14 PMBye,
missy